


We Just Got To Let It Be

by niennaerso



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Sad Kara Danvers, Sad with a Happy Ending, probably a little of angst too, well not exactly what you would consider a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-10 01:13:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17416148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/niennaerso/pseuds/niennaerso
Summary: Kara had a way of picturing her future, hopefully, with a certain someone. Something happened and changed her plans, and her way of seeing her own future.A story about learning about how love makes everyone a dumbass, and how everyone can be a better version of themselves.





	We Just Got To Let It Be

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Let It Be by Hayley Kiyoko.
> 
> Also, this may or may not be inspired by real life events. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

“Are you kidding me? You’re not the only one who feels that way!”

Kara was bursting in happiness, hope and excitement. Something that she’d dreamed of for a couple of years was becoming true, or at least that’s what she thought. Everything seemed too good to be true.

“Oh.” Lena looked surprised and weirdly worried. 

“Oh?” Kara echoed and looked away, trying to ease the situation.

“I’m sorry, Kara. I am so, so, sorry. Please… please don’t get mad at me.” The brunette took a step closer in an attempt of catching Kara’s eyes. Only successful for a millisecond.

Kara’s happiness and hope were taken away with those few words. And instead, fear, embarrassment and sadness filled in. She couldn’t help but think the worse. That way, any result would be better than the expected. But she wasn’t hoping she’d be right.

Her brain replayed the previous conversation more than once, giving her the worst headache she’s ever had.

_“Hey!” Lena showing up at her place was always a nice surprise, except that it wasn’t a surprise, she wouldn’t show up without telling Kara she’d be there. Anyway, the theatrically seductive pose with the hip against the door was indeed something new and a surprise._

__

_“Hey, what brings you here?”_

_“What? Nothing! I just felt like it.” Lena said._

_“Sure.” Kara was unconvinced._

_“And I needed to talk to you.”_

_“There it is.” Kara smirked. She knew she was right._

_“Hush. How are you?” Lena asked, and Kara looked at her frowning and smiling at the same time. They never asked that question, because they could tell how the other was feeling just by looking at them. “I’m interested on your well-being, that’s all.” She added with a soft laugh._

_“I’m fine, you?”_

_“Me too. Well, I wanted to tell you something that might be a little weird.” She paused. “I like you. Like-like you. I’m telling you because it feels one sided, and I can’t contain it anymore...”_

 

“It was a joke, I- I’m sorry Kara, I do like you too, it’s just, ugh, I shouldn’t have done this.” The brunette reached for the flower vase at her side and pulled out a little device. She’d been filming.

Kara’s heart shrunk and her head felt dizzy again. She had experienced extreme opposite emotions under five minutes and it felt like death.

“Wow... I don’t know what to say.”

“Please forgive me, Kara, I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Well you did, and I forgive you. But get out of my house. Now.” Kara said in the most calmed way possible. Internally she wasn’t as calmed though, and the only thing she wanted to do was to destroy all the objects her hands could reach. She wasn’t going to lose control in front of her.

Lena gave up in that moment, she knew that if she pushed Kara she’d only make things worse.

The next day after work, Kara just wanted to avoid social interaction by locking herself in her apartment and rejecting her sister’s invitation to go to the alien bar. It was until her phone rang. The only person that could be calling was also the one person she didn’t want to talk to. Still, she knew her dignity was already non existent, so she picked it up.

_“Kara? Can we talk?”_

“Sure, whatever.” Kara said with no interest whatsoever.

_“Look I’m really sorry, but I might as well try and make it better.” There was a pause. “I haven’t figured out myself yet, but I know I like you. And if you feel the way you said, then I have been right about every little thing that happened between us. Only when I’m with you I feel like I can be myself. I remember that, when we used to watch movies together, we would always say how much we envy the main couple because of their epic love story. And in those moments I would always think that we could be like them.”_

A stab wound would hurt less. After tricking Kara to think she had feelings for her and recording her reaction to probably use it as a prank, Kara had involuntarily lost trust on her. Her brain made that decision, not her heart. And said muscle in her chest was extremely against logic, and wanted to hold onto the words she just heard.

“I… It’s hard to believe.” She responded, despite of her brain wanting to say a blatant ‘I don’t believe you’. Obviously her heart had a slightly different idea. A little bit of hope sparked in her chest, wondering how much their friendship would change. “But I meant it, when I said how I felt. Now I just don’t know what to believe, Lena.”

_“I know, and I am so fucking sorry. Are we still friends? Please, I don’t want to lose you.”_ Lena was making her life very difficult lately, but Kara would take the responsibility of it knowing it’s her fault because she falls for everything pretty easily.

“Hey, no, you’re not gonna get rid of me that easily.” And that was it. The friendship wasn’t ruined. Both of them believed that for a while.

As a few months passed, Kara’s hopes went higher. The only way the friendship changed was the flirting, because there was so much of it. They expressed their feelings quite often, and Kara allowed herself to dream again, like she did before the… incident. And like she did during the intense first minutes of that cursed conversation. Who could blame her? Lena was caring, funny, beautiful and confident, and whoever didn’t have a crush on her was out of their right mind. Kara knew though, that her feelings didn’t fit the definition of a crush (with the exception that Lena literally _crushed_ her feelings months ago), because deep inside she knew she was properly in love with her best friend. If someone found out and accused her of dreaming of the sappiest things one could imagine in a romance novel, they’d be absolutely right. Kara wasn’t able to deny that she hoped to spend the rest of her life with her. To move in together into a cabin in the middle of nowhere, blasting show tunes because no one else would be there to complain. To go to sleep with her and waking up by her side. And again, who could blame her?

Of course, Kara was not the only one who had feelings. A mutual friend of them had the same interest in Lena, and seeing the flirting aimed at the brunette made Kara immensely mad.

“Did James just call you _‘babe’_?” The guy had passed by Lena’s place to drop off some paperwork and unfortunately, Kara happened to be there to witness the whole interaction.

“Yeah, he’s being doing it for a while.” Lena explained and Kara’s eyes opened in disbelief of what she had actually heard. “Wait, does it bother you? Are you jealous?”

“No shit, Sherlock.” Kara was out of her everyday-self. Only a few times her inner passive-aggressiveness came out to shine, and very few people get to see her in that state.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you cared.” Did Lena seem honest? Kara couldn’t tell.

“Yeah, that’s pretty clear.” 

“Well I know how he feels, I can’t hurt his feelings.”

“Wow. I’m sorry, I thought…” _‘this was different, that it was going somewhere.’_ she was going to say, but she couldn’t. It was going to hurt her more. “Don’t worry, I have no rights here. I better go now.” She stood up and grabbed her jacket and her bag, and walked towards the door. She turned back one last time before opening it. “Have a good day, Lena. See you another day. Bye.” After that, she was gone. For good this time.

Another few months later, her heart and her brain still fought a daily war to control Kara. She was still unable to get over Lena. The distance they held between them now was almost torture for her, and she reached her limit. And only one person knew her well enough to tell something was wrong. Her sister, who insisted she should call Lena.

“I shouldn’t.”

“Yes you should. Talk to her.” Her sister repeated.

“No, Alex. I really shouldn’t. I’m only gonna make it worse.” Kara protested. To be fair, she was right even if she didn’t know it at the moment.

“Didn’t you two had an argument the last time you spoke?”

“Well, technically, I snapped. She didn’t do anything.”

“In any case, you ended on bad terms. What if she’s sorry about what bothered you and she still wants to be your friend?”

“Well that’d be awkward. I don’t feel like being her friend anymore.”

She followed her sister’s insistence advice and called Lena. Kara knew the chances of regretting it later were high, but she took advantage of the suddenly lack of cowardice in her and did it anyways. It rang only twice before.

“Hey.” she murmured.

_“Hi.”_ Lena responded. _“How have you been?”_

“Fine, I guess. I’ve been better.” Kara felt it was the mostly honest answer. Her life was hell for a little while, until it the hurt became bearable.

_“I missed you.”_

“I missed you too.” And that was her heart talking.

_“Are we okay?”_ Lena asked.

“Yeah, of course.”

_“So, friends again?”_ There was a pinch of hope present in her voice.

“Is that what you really want?” Kara just couldn’t believe it. 

_“Well, I don’t think I’m ready to be in a relationship. But I don’t want to lose our friendship.”_

“That’s not what I- Sure, I understand.” She gave up. Instead of explaining what she actually meant, which was _“Are you sure you still wanna be friends with me, after I’ve confessed and made everything awkward?”_ , she followed the lead and let it go. Thinking that it should’ve been the first thing she should’ve done. “I don’t think we can be friends, not right now. Bye.” If something was true, she needed time to accept, process and heal all of that, and regularly seeing the face that had caused all of it wouldn’t help. She dedicated the woman in front of her a small smile and walked away without waiting for a response. She already knew it. And so Lena lost Kara, after saying she wouldn’t, even if she wanted. Turns out there was a loophole: they never consider what would happen if Kara herself wanted to get lost.

Sighing, she entered her apartment, to find her sister waiting for her on the couch, with italian take over and homemade soup on the side table by the sofa. What would Kara do without her. She might be the one with actual super powers, but her sister had another kind of those.

It should be noted that almost two years in the future, she would look back at this, and her chest would ache with embarrassment instead of hurt. Time took the pain away, and brought the calm and happiness she once lost and seemed to never come back.


End file.
